Transitions

Paperback Throne

2009-07-30T21:03:00.000-07:00

We decided to check out the high school Richard may attend if he moves back, and on the way, we wandered off, ending up in the foothills of the Santa Cruz Mountains. It was the most beautiful wrong turn ever.

We left after a few minutes: it was hot, my grandmother was in the car, we still had the high school to see, and I was having a bad morning and thus being a brat wailing about all the missed photographic opportunities (since I sadly forgot my camera at home). After seeing the high school on the base of the mountains, I moped all the way home and ended up overtaken by my emotional idiocy and ended up crying on my bed, still deeply upset I wasn't able to take photos. Why it was such a big deal to me, I will never know, but my mother, being the most amazing mom on earth, drove Richard and me back to the park just so I could take a picture or two. Richard and I ended up jumping and screaming on the one-lane roads up and down the mountain.

I'm like a lion.

They weren't practices

2009-07-29T23:06:00.000-07:00

James took Richard and me to Mountain View (Shoreline Golf Links) to golf; the weather was really perfect, but our golf skills were quite the opposite. I felt pretty bad because we were terrible to the point where we really slowed and dragged things down -- other golfers passed us plenty of times (and the first time we were slightly chided -- I thought he was pretty condescending -- for not waving them forward since we were finishing so slowly). It took us close to four hours to finish six or seven holes; we accidentally skipped a couple and ended up at the end of the ninth hole, so we just decided to go eat lunch at BJ's... WHICH IS AMAZING. The boys opted for pasta (Richard was predictable and ordered angel hair), but I got a heavenly California burger and then we shared their cookies 'n cream pizookie (pizza cookie aka a large, soft, cookie the size of a mini pizza with ice cream piled on top) and my mouth cried with bliss.

There was a point in the game where several Canada geese (there are a billion there) flew over our heads in a V-formation, and it was really beautiful. They were less than six feet overhead -- it was a very movie-scene moment and had I not been mid-swing, I would have been snapping at that like crazy.

"Lunch is served."

Strike!

2009-07-26T20:04:00.000-07:00

Buckling

2009-07-25T22:47:00.000-07:00

We went to an estate shop in downtown Saratoga today and looked at little trinkets -- tea cups organized by color, wood-carved clocks, and torn geography textbooks from the 1940s. I love little stores like that, places that still display things you normally can't see and find otherwise.

I usually never end up buying things from those places (for one, collectible antiques like that are usually uncompromisingly expensive, and plus, where am I supposed to put these delicate things?), but today I ended up finding something special at the jewelry section: A belt bracelet for only $10! It's quirky and a little confusing -- just the way I like it. I sense a jewelry-wearing revival in the my life.

8

2009-07-23T11:26:00.000-07:00

My little brother's not so little anymore.

Woodland Creatures

2009-07-19T21:43:00.000-07:00

Places I haven't been for years and years and years.

Bought my

2009-07-10T19:11:00.000-07:00

Teehee.

我们两个

2009-06-21T00:12:00.000-07:00

Happy Father's Day, Daddy.

Yellow

2009-06-17T14:35:00.001-07:00

Does the regret ever go away?
It's been more than six months and I feel the same amount of pain and guilt as I did the afternoon he died.

Try This Mango

2009-06-15T23:37:00.000-07:00

I love visiting Betty's (and Randy's) house, even if it's just for two days. From building forts out of pillows and houses out of plastic sticks draped with table cloths and bedsheets to Betty owning a REAL, life-size house -- it's all so surreal.

Anyway, she made some really good 牛肉汤, and I picked and ate all the carrots. I wasn't able to bake anything this time, but I guess that's for my own good -- I'd just end up eating all of it anyway. I do have a little trouble with this one thing called self-control. You may have heard of it?

Watched Jon & Kate Plus 8, decided I can no longer justify my sympathy toward Kate, ate La Salsa (my first time -- so good!), and bummed around. Taking the train up north tomorrow: to grandmother's house I go!

Like that one Afroman song

2009-06-15T13:46:00.000-07:00

Laura was nice enough to adopt me for a couple days (and my mountain of belongings for many, many days) into her home in Lancaster. Matt surprised Laura with roses and other little trinkets, and he was sweet enough to also get me a faux plant and Hello Kitty band aids! He treated us to 3D tickets to see Up (I cried to the point my 3D glasses fogged up... no joke), dinner, and gift cards to F21. The days went by pretty fast; we ate fried ramen, blue oreos, and Skyped with our dearest Ana all the way in Mexico City.

We also drove on the Musical Road, where if you drive over it, tactile vibrations transmit through the wheels into the car body and make a melody! Being the five year old I am, I died with joy. It felt like Disneyland minus any waiting time. I swear, if I lived in Lancaster, I would be driving down that road a hundred times a day.

Mom

2009-06-09T23:24:00.000-07:00

[6/8/2009 1:46:23 AM] Mom: hello, are you sleeping, are you sleeping, valerie, valerie
[6/8/2009 1:46:26 AM] Mom: mommy miss you
[6/8/2009 1:46:32 AM] Mom: have a good sleep
[6/8/2009 1:46:39 AM] Mom: be prepared for the finals!
[6/8/2009 1:46:42 AM] Mom: YEAH!
[6/8/2009 1:46:51 AM] Mom: ok, good night
[6/8/2009 1:47:02 AM] Mom: just want to say something to you.

Writing 109V Final Project

2009-06-03T19:14:00.000-07:00

The final project for my Writing for the Visual Arts class was to put together a visual piece coupled with words. I was debating between doing a brochure or a mix CD sleeve with music reviews, but with two other final essays to complete, I was sort of cornered into this easier route. I had a lot of fun with it -- I hadn't designed anything as extensive as this for a very long time, so I decided to share. My mother's proud of it, so I think all's well in the world!

Dancing with Girl Talk at Extravaganza '09

2009-06-03T13:30:00.000-07:00

Photo credit: Sean Leiberman
Self-explanatory, don't you think?

Lady Conversations

2009-05-17T13:23:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day

2009-05-10T22:23:00.000-07:00

"Love you more than a mouse loves cheese."

I hope you have more luck with it than me

2009-04-29T23:27:00.000-07:00

Death Cab played a free show at my school because we had the most student voter registrations for the past election. Seeing them made me elated and nostalgic, and the fact that it was free was icing on the cake. I would have paid $100 if you asked me in high school. But being in college now... well, they weren't what I had set them up to be -- I mean they still sounded fantastic, but I was not, by any means, blown away like I always pictured myself to be.

Took these with Laura's little Kodak (we snuck it in my putting it in my tights -- I feel like I waddled my way in, but good thing we chose to hide it there, because they patted down my boots, which is where I originally put it), so that's why there's so much noise in the photos.

That said, if Ben Gibbard ever loses his musical tendencies, he should come out with a diet book. Seriously.

全家

2009-04-22T21:08:00.000-07:00

木瓜牛奶!

Three peanuts and a Starburst jelly bean!

我每天喝两个!

I still can't identify this animal.

Pictures from my trip to Taiwan. I'm so thankful my grandma bought my tickets for this -- I saw Richard, Sunny, and everyone I hadn't seen in such a long time. It was a humongous family reunion/vacation, which we haven't had since I was in high school!

Serena made time for me everyday after work -- we'd go to night markets and try new, amazing restaurants. Aunt Debbie took me shopping as well, and let me choose an agnes b. bag as a gift from Shirley. Of course I chose black; it's very structured, cute, and a perfect size for everyday school happenings. It's also the first "designer" bag I got while being in the actual, namestake store (as opposed to Nordstrom or another carrier), so that was really exciting; I could relive that feeling daily.

I got red envelopes, which is probably reason enough for everyone to want to be Taiwanese/Asian, ha! I'm terrified of growing too old for it, but also excited to one day, be rich enough to hand red envelopes out to the next generation and have them think I am awesome for giving them these crimson gifts of godliness. I've always thought it was funny to be Taiwanese (or just Asian, period). I mean, you have these common codes of courteousness -- there's that standard, initial refusal that's open and chiding from the adult, and shy (and most definitely overshadowed by the adult "No, no, no! Don't do this!") and confused look from the kid. I can't even begin to recount how many times I've desperately looked at and awkwardly edged toward my mother whenever presented with a red envelope, and it's as if that's a visual cue for the giver to edge toward you, brandishing the red envelope like a sword. After 30 seconds (though it can go up to a minute or so) of refusal (or insistence from the other side) of why the red envelope should and shouldn't be given, it's somehow shoved down the kid's throat and then a slew of laughter and "thank you"s are thrown all over the place instead. And THEN, even though you've already said your meek "thank you," the conversation will, guaranteed, go like this:

Mom: DID YOU SAY THANK YOU?!
You: Yeahhhh
Giver: Yes, she did! She's such a great kid!

And then I'm left holding this red envelope in my hand, playing the game, Pretend You Have X-Ray Vision And Can Tell How Much Is Enclosed. What I've realized now though, is that I need to start my own refusals while my mother or grandmother look on, and it is very, very awkward. Secret's out, Asian children; I've just exposed the mind's Red Envelope routine.

But anyway, I'm behind in school work, but the trip was well worth it.

Hansen and Mavis' Wedding

2009-04-21T04:58:00.000-07:00

The bride has to be presented two oranges and feel them. I think it has to do with some fertility superstition. Actually, I just made that up, I don't know why they need to be felt. They did, however, roll my brother in bed at 3:10 am the day of the wedding, so that their kid will be "as smart as Richard."

... I've been the flower girl at three weddings and never got asked to be rolled in bed at 3:10 am. HMMMMMM.

Uncle Ben playing DS, ha!

My cousin Hansen got married on April 19th, and it was a really beautiful and moving wedding ceremony. I met a million relatives who apparently only saw me when I was an inch tall. If you think about it, that means I puh-robably drooled on more than half the room. Anyway, thinking back on Betty's wedding and now Hansen's... I'm so happy they've each found love. The romantic in me still firmly believes it's really all you need.

Like strawberries in the summertime

2009-04-21T02:49:00.000-07:00

Fleet Foxes came to UCSB to play a show on April 20th, and I finally saw Skye perform after being friends with him for over six years. He hooked me up ridiculously well, giving me two comp tickets and two backstage passes (which I gave to Kyle to enjoy with me), and we hung out a couple hours before the show and after it. I also talked to Eric Earley from Blitzen Trapper (let's just say I swooned).

Fleet Foxes sounds even better live, and Robin's quips are endearingly humble and amusing. I don't know the rest of the boys, but they all appeared to be such excellent characters, and I'm so glad Skye has/is finding the success he has always deserved.

Instantaneous

2009-03-23T19:01:00.000-07:00

Grandma and I took a walk this afternoon.
She asked me what I was doing with my Polaroid pointed toward our shadows on the fences.

I told her to just look forward.

Como se dice

2009-02-19T23:46:00.000-08:00

The girls turned 22!

Naps

2009-02-09T01:22:00.001-08:00

I had the most frightening nightmare today, and now I'm afraid to go to sleep.

How do you say hiccup?

2009-01-17T17:35:00.000-08:00

"Gnargnar"

We got two new suitemates, Ana and Gabi, from Mexico! They are the cutest, sweetest girls. I took them and their friend, Pablo, to the Reef's touch tank on Saturday.

盗版

2009-01-01T22:36:00.000-08:00

哈哈哈!

带便当

2009-01-01T22:29:00.000-08:00

Red Velvet

2008-12-14T20:59:00.000-08:00

I arrived in Los Angeles last night and baked some red velvet cupcakes with vanilla frosting and red sprinkles this afternoon. I love Betty's oven/kitchen-area, I swear, I could just make baked goodies in there all day every day.

My babies chillin' on the cooling rack.

Ready to hit the road north and be eaten by anyone with respectable tastebuds.

Grandfather's Funeral: December 11, 2008

2008-12-13T15:23:00.000-08:00

Betty, Serena, Richard, Sunny, and I wrote little eulogies and read them at the funeral. I left right after lunch for school and midterms. I'm glad I made it. If I hadn't, I would have regretted not going for the rest of my life.

I miss him so much.

Ring Mazes Guided by Choice and Fate

2008-12-10T23:53:00.000-08:00

We all came back for the funeral. All four granddaughters (and Richard) were in the same place at the same time for the first time of our lives. A-ma took out four real, gold necklaces and their respective rings. We drew short horizontal lines between four long vertical lines, blindly chose a line and put our names under them, and then unraveled the paper and followed our paths. The rules were that we had to turn into one of the many horizontal lines every time we hit one, and it would lead us to the necklace and ring that was supposed to be ours. I already had my eye on one I really liked, and even though I was the third to go, I ended up with it! Betty, Serena, and I all ended up with our first choices. Sunny didn't, but mostly because she didn't have a preference to begin with. A-ma mentioned how strange it was that Sunny got the "ugliest" one -- it was just a gold oval -- but it worked out so perfectly because she won't be wearing it anytime soon, and by the time she's at the age to want and wear these things, one of these things will happen again.

A Valediction for My Name

2008-12-04T02:58:00.000-08:00

Part I.

the only memorable photograph I have is you
holding me
in a white cotton shirt, probably from the Island,
the fabric loose and stretched and thinned; a lone
thread dangling from the stitching of the sleeve seam -- weaving into the time I saw
the bulge of candy cradled in your khaki pockets and hearing your laughter dismiss my eyes as deceptive telescopes --
soul searchers and heart watchers that couldn’t get a thing right.

but I saw you suck them in the garden I saw you
among my mother’s hyacinths and ferns, I saw them
burst in your mouth like lonely black fireworks against lonelier black skies,
your dentures click-clacking like hooves of hoary show mares.

these knees have not forgotten to respond to the whip of your words;
picking the fallen cherry blossom petals blown in from hostile winter winds,
the ones that arranged themselves around your throne of wheels and canes where you
sat alone
against cyclic prints of dull, autumn flowers.

and remember the heat that irritated your skin tangled in the blankets?
your incessant demands to arrange the angle of the cerulean fan so that it would blow straight into your face?
you looked like a child swallowing mouthfuls of air from a leather backseat,
muted by gusts of dirt and exhaust of trucks that ventured to go places you would not.

but we made the whirring blades hit the bare wall, we made
them bounce onto your peppered chin hairs
that you silently unrooted as you stared and thought thoughts
that failed the fatal march to the tip of your tongue.

and by three, the company had gone home to the arms of less belligerent beds and states.
but we did not let you breathe alone
even when you gave up before we did.

and I beg you to know that though you died alone, you
did not die Alone.
you did not die Alone, you did not die,
Alone you did not, die Alone
you did not.

Thank you anyway

2008-12-03T21:03:00.000-08:00

The scene:

Bus, groceries (two), talking to Laura, phone vibrates, I pick up.

Betty's whispering, quiet, and serious, and then: A-gong 走了 -- and I just said, "What." "Yeah, just an hour ago." "What." I called my mother right after Betty hung up, and I told her while she wailed and I cried. I wonder if my dad cried. It was probably 17:17.

Our relationship was tumultuous to say the least, and though he'd been sick for so long, the idea of death just didn't seem too near or possible. On one hand, I'm glad my grandmother's free from visiting him day after day after day, but at the same time, I just lost any chance I had of getting to know him not even as my grandfather, but as a person. I have vaults of questions and it's so overwhelming:

Why didn't you ever want to know me? Why didn't you ever love? What was your favorite color, and what smell made your mouth water? How old were you when you started drinking and who gave you your first cigarette? Did you name the pigs you owned, and did you have a secret hiding spot? Did you date? Did you have a favorite band? Have you ever picked a bouquet, and which one of the flowers in your garden was your favorite? Could you teach me Chinese calligraphy? Why didn't you ever hug me or stroke my hair?

Things I thought I forgot are rushing back, playing like quick slides in my mind. They look like broken film stills running through an old projector with a dusty lens. It's silent, it's disjointed. I'm so scared of forgetting his voice, the clacking of dentures, the phlegm-y cough, the rusty laugh.

I never thought I'd say this, but I miss you so much.

I wanna paint your nails

2008-11-26T16:49:00.000-08:00

SB to Lancaster to LA to Lancaster to SB.
We saw of Montreal at the Hollywood Palladium and it was the best show in the whole world -- a billion times better than their performance at UCSD last year. I saw a boy with Kevin Barnes' red body paint streaked on his face, so I asked if I could touch his cheek and transfer Kevin Barnes onto my own face. He granted my wish and I floated into a cloud of bliss. I think it's going to take me over a year to get over this. I'm still reeling.

L.Bo's 20th

2008-11-16T23:01:00.000-08:00

My beach carrot.

Our suite had the first birthday.
I even braved the beach for Laura!
I KNOW!

Life of Py

2008-11-13T00:08:00.000-08:00

The hills are on fire.

Can you imagine being left with only memories?

Sunshine

2008-11-11T01:11:00.000-08:00

I miss my ray of light.

WE HAVE CHANGE

2008-11-04T20:11:00.000-08:00

I get to say my vote helped get the 44th president get elected.

Bromance

2008-10-28T23:57:00.000-07:00

Laura and I got fishbabies! All three of them are male guppies: The orange one's Laura's Penelope, the yellow one's my Colonel, and the baby one's the suite's Guppita Pit. We're going to look for toys soon!

S & B in SB

2008-10-06T15:43:00.000-07:00

Serena flew in from Taipei on Thursday, and Betty and Serena drove up from LA to come visit me at school. It was a much needed break from things, and I loved every hour we all spent together. They tried my dorm food, I took them on the scenic routes (the paths on the beach shores) and also showed them the little aquarium on campus. Betty drove me around for food and bedroom necessities, and when we came back, I took them to Goleta Beach for a little bit. It was really windy, and it rained in the morning, but by noon the skies cleared up and turned bright blue. They left at 7. I started missing them by 6.

Even Artichokes

2008-09-23T01:06:00.001-07:00

I feel like I can't say anything because nothing will ever be subtle enough.

Propelled

2008-09-20T23:49:00.000-07:00

I took the plane to Santa Barbara today. The Santa Barbara Airport is lilliputian, really, so the planes that jet passengers to and fro are proportionally small in size. They're the kind Howard Hughes probably flew, with small propellers conducting cacophonous symphonies. I sat by the left propeller today, and while dividing my time watching the propeller spin until it looks like it wasn't even turning at all and looking past the clouds and onto the landscape, I couldn't help but think about how terrible but excitingly bizarre it would be if a bird flew into the propeller and splattered its beak and feet and feathers, blood staining the pristine windows.

I think some people call this "morbid."

Winding

2008-09-18T15:00:00.001-07:00

July 7, 2008 to September 16, 2008 were the happiest two months and nine days of my entire year. It's really hard to describe and express the pure, unfiltered happiness I felt every moment I was with them in Shanghai and Wuxi and Hangzhou.

I'm always homesick; not in the sense that I long for a place, for a physical structure in which to comfortably live and reside, but rather for my home, which, to me, is my family and wherever they are, wherever that may be.

P.S. Richard skipped sixth grade!
Yeah, it's pretty awesome, being related to a little genius.

Biking in Hangzhou

2008-09-14T23:10:00.000-07:00

Sunny ran into friends.

Yes, we went there for a second time.
I'm having trouble articulating just how much I really love Hangzhou!

西湖

2008-09-08T14:57:00.000-07:00

Saluting the Bentley.

Richard's Sprite bottle filter.

We went to 西湖 in 杭州 several days ago. So in love with this place. Imagine Shanghai but slightly more quaint and green.

Donut feed donut

2008-09-05T18:25:00.000-07:00

After Sunny came home from school, we went to the nearby pond and fed the koi a donut from Mister Donut.

That's an impossible price for fish!

2008-08-31T15:12:00.000-07:00

The algae and cyanobacteria smelled. 太湖 is the third largest freshwater lake in China... and is notorious for its polluted waters.

We squeezed in an impromptu trip to Wuxi before school started for Richard and Sunny. Richard and I decided the hotel was perfect. There's not too much to do in Wuxi, but we went to the countryside and to a temple, and it was very classic, Chinese-scenery pretty. It would have been lovely to live in China centuries ago, when the land was untouched. I'm willing to bet that some of the prettiest places in the world are in the countrysides of China.

Oh, and Richard's feet look like clown feet in these photographs -- kind of super funny.

Heart it races

2008-08-05T15:29:00.000-07:00

We explored our 小区 today.
We have mandarin ducks and houses for the mandarin ducks!

汤

2008-08-03T23:21:00.000-07:00

Hee hee hee.

Food, glorious food

2008-08-03T14:38:00.000-07:00

DISCLAIMER: MOM, DON'T READ THIS, YOU WILL CRY.

What's the point of being a turtle if you don't have a hard shell to retract into?

I took Richard and Sunny to 上海昆虫和宠物管. We lost our innocence.
Don't ask me why we went during feeding time. I DON'T KNOW!

Sitting, waiting

2008-06-15T21:07:00.000-07:00

Betty and Randy had a housewarming party.

First year of college is officially over and I'm in Los Angeles. Due to my own stupidity, I didn't do enough research to realize that my passport expires in August, and a visa can only be granted to passports with more than three months left on the passport. Soooo, in the past few days, I've had to apply for a passport renewal, reapply for a visa, and also go to the DMV to get my official California ID, since I'm now over 18 and have to have my own ID in order to renew the passport. Betty's been more than kind and patient with me to take me to all these places. I feel bad, but at least it's a lesson learned.

I can't wait to go home!
I can't wait to go home!

Oh, and also...

I can't wait to go home!

Cozy pals

2008-06-10T17:18:00.000-07:00

I made two little snuggies for my iPod touch (thanks Mom!) today. One of them matches my handmade (and often ridiculed/compared-to-a-pillow) laptop sleeve. I think that print is so cute, though. I wish I had a sewing machine so I could make a circle skirt out of it.

Wicked wisdom

2008-06-02T20:50:00.000-07:00

It was cool, but it was all pretend

2008-05-25T20:23:00.000-07:00

I didn't feel like doing homework on this fine spring day.
So I drew.

The information's based on Kyle's upcoming show.

May flowers

2008-05-16T01:24:00.000-07:00

I've been happy lately. Happiness doesn't need captions or explanations!

Only leaving once a day

2008-05-10T21:04:00.000-07:00

WE ARE IN CAPTIVITY!

These are a billion times fatter than the ones on Meerkat Manor!

Kyle, Andrew, and I went to the Santa Barbara Zoo and it was zooper fun. I'd been dying to go ever since I heard of the giraffe with the crooked neck. Unfortunately, she died several months ago, so I didn't exactly get to fulfill that dream, but the other animals were still amusing. Aquariums still own my heart, but this zoo excursion reached pretty high awesome levels.

No label

2008-05-08T23:42:00.000-07:00

Not too shabby

2008-04-24T11:14:00.000-07:00

Went to Anaheim to see one of Kyle's shows.
But the main reason why I went was to spread the Asian ways.

Amusement Parks

2008-04-12T02:30:00.000-07:00

Nineteen.

My whole life

2008-04-04T15:32:00.000-07:00

I can't believe they are 11 and 8.
I don't remember how I was able to live for eight years without one of them and eleven without two. It's so strange to think that there was a time in my life (the majority, so far), when I was alone.

I hate bugs

2008-04-03T19:53:00.000-07:00

Please see title.

Strangers Through Life

2008-03-24T21:52:00.000-07:00

I have spent my entire life disliking my grandfather, and I have tried so hard to reason with myself and find the good in him. But it is really difficult trying to love someone who does not give half the effort to love and be loved.

I'm just sorry you were never able to experience the desire to sacrifice anything and everything for others, or the swelling of the heart when it wildly palpitates and responds to the connection with another, or the jerking of the tear ducts and the involuntary lifting of the corners of your mouth when you're so overcome with feeling all that is good, that you could burst into a million little pieces, but while scattered across the universe, still feel entirely whole.

Use

2008-03-18T00:49:00.001-07:00

Often, I find myself wondering if I really should have just taken some loans and gone to Smith. I don't feel like I'm really growing and maturing as a person here, and it's really frightening because my main goal is to discover myself -- my true passions, my beliefs -- the things that define who I am (whatever that is), even when I am stripped of this makeup, these clothing, these social norms I unknowingly conform and act to please.

Would I be fitter, happier (not to sound like a Radiohead track), more whole and content? I'm a firm believer of perspective being the determinant of your own happiness, and I've tried really hard to see the best in this situation. I'm patiently waiting for the view, but I'm worried because the vault of patience is a numerable amount.

I have met some amazing people, and that, with a select number of things I am learning in some classes I am taking, makes everything fairly tolerable and decently pleasant, but there's still something missing, and I can't figure it out.

Betty and Randy's Wedding

2008-02-19T00:50:00.000-08:00

Betty and Randy got married on Friday, February 15th.
It was a really intimate and lovely ceremony, and Stephanie and I were the two official witnesses to this happy union! I am so happy for them; growing up with Betty, it is so surreal and amazing how much we've grown together. She was, what they say, "the older sister you never had" -- but I did and still do have her as a big sister, so I'm not sure if that saying really applies. I'm so happy for her, and how one day I'l be an aunt and how our children can one day also have the bond she and I created and continue to share.

The sun's identity crisis

2008-01-13T14:51:00.000-08:00

What is going on? It's January, there's sun, there are people sunbathing on kelly green lawns?! Where is my snow! I wait for winter every year!

The Geminids

2007-12-14T11:27:00.000-08:00

Jenny and I watched the Geminid showers at 2 am. There were so many and so often, it was beautiful. It always trips me out when I start thinking about space and everything else celestial. We're just so small, minute, and insignificant in the grand scheme of things...

Pumpkins!

2007-11-23T23:58:00.000-08:00

I went to Betty and Randy's new house for Thanksgiving this year. It's so nice, new, and matchy-matchy! We had the Taiwanese approach to Thanksgiving: hot pot instead of turkey, and it was so delicious and reminiscent of my childhood. We stopped doing Thanksgiving after my parents left for China, so I think this was my first one in six or seven years, eek! Anyway, I ate a million pumpkins. I could go all sappy, thanking everyone around me for everything, but I'd like to think they know how thankful I am on a daily basis.

Sketch

2007-11-14T23:48:00.000-08:00

Sketches

2007-11-14T23:45:00.000-08:00

Sketches

2007-11-14T23:38:00.000-08:00

We want our dreams to be beautiful, not realistic

2007-11-12T20:31:00.000-08:00

I visited Holly and went to see of Montreal play at UCSD last night. I feel like my life is complete. of Montreal is amazing live -- they're just this humongous explosion of joy. It was by far, the most fun I had at a show. Since Holly was working the show, I was there super early -- as in the first person in line, and I made friends with three high school boys who lined up right behind me. I only remember that one was named Joaquin and that one looked like a young Robert Smith. Anyway, our short friendship brought perks to both parties -- Holly let them back in after two of them left for the bathroom and were denied re-entry, and at the end of the show, one of them fought for and got the set list, which he handed to me as a little gift. Oh right, MGMT opened, and it was blah. They sounded nice, but their stage presence was nonexistent.

I helped Holly clean up the backstage rooms, and I entered the shrine while KEVIN BARNES WAS STILL INSIDE AND ON HIS MACBOOK PRO. I pretty much died.

Edit: of Montreal has my first photograph as the opening, greeter photograph on their band blog (the photo section). I'm hyperventilating.

Callidge

2007-10-04T14:39:00.000-07:00

Of course I'd be cradling the duffel bag of food. Of COURSE.

We made my move-in a little family affair.
I'm excited to start a new chapter in my life. Here's hoping for the best!

Took eight months and 15 days

2007-08-17T19:13:00.000-07:00

I'm over him, I'm over him, I'm finally, finally over him!

Rent

2007-06-16T23:35:00.000-07:00

Mr. Chen put up with my last minute application to the UCs. Actually, he persuaded me to just apply to UCSB anyway, and now look where I'm going!

CSC and SMAKIT, WUT WUT.

I can't believe I'm done with high school. Shanghai has honestly been the best thing that's ever happenend to me... Who else gets to graduate in a class of 12?

Anyway, since I'm giddy to the point of speechlessness and can't really articulate my post-graduation feelings, my parents took me out to the Shangri-La for their buffet lunch, which I love, love, love. Best sushi ever and salmon to fill my 158.66 cm frame. Ah!

Oh Stan

2007-06-08T16:11:00.000-07:00

I love Element Fresh.
And Stan ruining (or making?!) all my pictures.

BK

2007-06-07T16:59:00.000-07:00

Light my candle!

2007-05-27T16:46:00.000-07:00

Since Lia and I were newly single, the two of us -- and Christine and Alyce -- decided to ditch the idea of boys and go stag for our senior prom. We got our nails and hair done at the Esprit Salon and had a delicious dinner at Haiku, where we indulged in amazing sushi rolls and the best beer in the world, aka Tsingtao (in the bottle, not the can -- it makes a difference). I thought the dresses we designed this year were considerably nicer, too, compared to our junior prom here. Anyway, it was held at the Hilton's Penthouse, and Christine's mother was nice enough to get us a room at the Hilton for the night/afterparty. We were economical and fit over 10 people on the bed.

RFC IV

2007-05-19T23:45:00.000-07:00

Not gonna lie, this one's just to show off my walkie-talkie.

My last time plannning RFC!
I love Lia!

Mon petit chou!

2007-05-06T00:16:00.000-07:00

Creme brulee from Cafe des Deux Moulins! I squealed! They named it after Amelie!

I wish they kept the interior the same.

I was in the same bookstore as Hemingway, Fitzgerald, Ginsberg, Stein, Man Ray, and Pound. That's just a recipe for hyperventilation for me.

My favorite vintage store in Paris.

Having a Napoleon at the Louvre!

Okay Chopin, we get it, you win.

Mom and Dad bought me a ticket to Paris for my 18th birthday, and I couldn't have asked for a better present. Paris has been my fantasy destination since I was 10, and I still can't believe it happened. I finally went to the city of my dreams!

Hansen was nice enough to house me for my visit, and Serena (who arrived a day earlier) and I explored all day while Hansen went to work. He would meet us afterwards and take us on picnics on the lawn in front of the Eiffel Tower, giggly walks in Pigalle, and dinners along the Seine. After a week, Xiao Doodoo and Gu Zhang came and met us, and the five of us took the train to Belgium for a few days. I was going to go up to Amsterdam with Serena, but I decided I wanted to see Paris a little more, so I took the train back down with Hansen. I just went to the Pompidou, a couple cemeteries, and revisited a couple more places by myself during my remaining time.

So much to say about such an amazing trip (and too many pictures I've had to leave out)! I'm glad I visited at an age where I can actually, independently explore and understand all the things around me. It was, in two words, absolutely perfect.

Bowl of Grapes

2007-04-23T23:52:00.000-07:00

Took the fingers out for a little bowling.
I'm flying to Paris tomorrow!!!!!!!!!

Received this text from my mother in January

2007-03-29T19:20:00.000-07:00

val my little
princess eat well
and be happy
nothing can't be
fixed with your
heart treat
harrison nicely
forgive and love
everyone that
comes into ur life
and thank them 4
teaching u about
life

----------------

I am trying very hard, and I think I'm on the path of recovery. If the seams are never resewn into the way they were, at least I know I got one amazing thing out of it: My mother and I have reached all time levels of closeness, and I love that I've finally realized that my mother has always been my best friend, confidante, and above all, my biggest fan.

Saving fish

2007-03-24T22:05:00.000-07:00

WE MET AMY TAN IN GLAMOUR BAR AT M ON THE BUND!

SHE DRINKS WATER!

AMY TAN AND CLIFF NOTES!